He makes up for not being mute by being not that bright. Clever he is!
Except for not being dumb and having a girlfriend, B&G could be “the ONE”.
Eh?
EH?!
that’s true, he *is* clever….not to mention funny. but i’m afraid the girlfriend is a dealbreaker. i am not a poacher. and while we are on the subject of poaching, there, buster, i believe them is MYtalics…
All right, so I have some (many) downsides. But how’s this for mixed messages. Here she tells me I’m not good enough because I must be bright (and girlfriendless) but in another comment she says, and I quote,
“yes, you should see this place.”
Hmmmmmmmmmm. If I knew who to italicize I’d be poaching right about now.
Yeah, I thought I probably shouldn’t italicize there. But once you know how it’s hard to stop. B&G is a laff-riot! Even if he doesn’t know HOW to italicize. When a man gets to be our age, the HTML tags get droopy. Don’t sweat it.
This limited HTML knowledge is easily shared B&G should you ever decide that you need to breech italic etiquette as I’ve done here. Just say the word.
My dad would advise you to search for a groom that is “rich and sick”. That’s his tag line. Not real original.
But I infer from your orphan requirement that you’d prefer not to have to deal with in-laws? And your communication with this deaf, dumb, smart, family-less husband would have to be in writing, wouldn’t it? That’s BRILLIANT. Unfortunately you would not be able to share one of your passions- music. So I think you might want to rethink this.
Other possible answers to “why you don’t marry” question …
Marriage is for SISSIES!
They ran out of licenses at town hall.
I couldn’t pass the blood test.
Excommunicated from my church.
Didn’t I tell you I took a vow of silence?
None of your effing bizniss!
You get the idea. I think marriage is heavily overrated and quite artificial. I think God might be artificial too.
Actually, I think I would like to try it someday. Being married, I mean. All the good ones are taken, though. Is my experience.
Leave my droopy tags outta this, mister! That’s a personal matter.
Hahahahahahahaha. You’re killing me. Too funny. I loved ‘I couldn’t pass the blood test.’
Getting off my droopy tags (which sounds like a cowboys sidekick) and back to marriage for a sec, one day my girlfriend and I were out and bantering (which could sound like an argument to the outside world) when the guy behind the counter said,
“Well, you married her.”
To which my girlfriend exclaimed, with a tad more emphasis than necessary,
I tell them, “I am holding out for a deaf & dumb orphan.”
6 comments
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June 13, 2008 at 9:25 am
boundandgags
My parents are dead, my hearing’s going and I’m not that bright. Does that qualify?
Daing it. No. You have to be smart. Sorry.
June 13, 2008 at 9:51 pm
David
He makes up for not being mute by being not that bright. Clever he is!
Except for not being dumb and having a girlfriend, B&G could be “the ONE”.
Eh?
EH?!
that’s true, he *is* clever….not to mention funny. but i’m afraid the girlfriend is a dealbreaker. i am not a poacher. and while we are on the subject of poaching, there, buster, i believe them is MYtalics…
June 14, 2008 at 7:52 am
boundandgags
All right, so I have some (many) downsides. But how’s this for mixed messages. Here she tells me I’m not good enough because I must be bright (and girlfriendless) but in another comment she says, and I quote,
“yes, you should see this place.”
Hmmmmmmmmmm. If I knew who to italicize I’d be poaching right about now.
June 14, 2008 at 7:53 am
boundandgags
I meant how to. I know who to italicize.
June 14, 2008 at 1:32 pm
David
Yeah, I thought I probably shouldn’t italicize there. But once you know how it’s hard to stop. B&G is a laff-riot! Even if he doesn’t know HOW to italicize. When a man gets to be our age, the HTML tags get droopy. Don’t sweat it.
This limited HTML knowledge is easily shared B&G should you ever decide that you need to breech italic etiquette as I’ve done here. Just say the word.
My dad would advise you to search for a groom that is “rich and sick”. That’s his tag line. Not real original.
But I infer from your orphan requirement that you’d prefer not to have to deal with in-laws? And your communication with this deaf, dumb, smart, family-less husband would have to be in writing, wouldn’t it? That’s BRILLIANT. Unfortunately you would not be able to share one of your passions- music. So I think you might want to rethink this.
Other possible answers to “why you don’t marry” question …
Marriage is for SISSIES!
They ran out of licenses at town hall.
I couldn’t pass the blood test.
Excommunicated from my church.
Didn’t I tell you I took a vow of silence?
None of your effing bizniss!
You get the idea. I think marriage is heavily overrated and quite artificial. I think God might be artificial too.
Actually, I think I would like to try it someday. Being married, I mean. All the good ones are taken, though. Is my experience.
Jeez, am I still writing … ?
June 15, 2008 at 12:18 pm
boundandgags
Leave my droopy tags outta this, mister! That’s a personal matter.
Hahahahahahahaha. You’re killing me. Too funny. I loved ‘I couldn’t pass the blood test.’
Getting off my droopy tags (which sounds like a cowboys sidekick) and back to marriage for a sec, one day my girlfriend and I were out and bantering (which could sound like an argument to the outside world) when the guy behind the counter said,
“Well, you married her.”
To which my girlfriend exclaimed, with a tad more emphasis than necessary,
“I’d never marry him!”
The look on the guys face was priceless.
“Priceless” is the look of a free man.